My cup runneth over.
The older I get, the more I recognize change in my life. Maybe it’s because I’d like to think I’m maturing more, so I’ve developed an awareness for it. Change is difficult whether it’s interpreted as good or “bad”.
Ultimately I think all change ends up being for the good.
Regardless, change is difficult.
I feel as if I say this every year but this was a year of change. It was a hard year looking back. But because I’m saved and a child of God, I view trials and obstacles differently and I know the One who guides me through them. So change is easier for me to handle. Difficult, but easier.
Some of the ways my life changed this year:
1. The passing of my step-dad back in May. It was hard. He’d been battling a three year war with cancer. And just like my real dad, was taken from the earth a bit too soon.
2. Stepping down from soccer. I resigned from coaching high school girls soccer after the season was over. It wasn’t because of anything bad. I just felt that chapter in my life was done.
3. My friendships. This summer I was kind of angry with God. I felt like He was removing people from my life left and right. Some of my closest and dearest friends. In hindsight, I know God just wanted to make room for me to grow in some certain areas and to depend on Him more than them.
4. My mindset on teaching. I went to a PLC Summer Institue in St. Louis, Missouri and it just changed my whole perspective on students. I now want ALL students at South Middle School to be successful. Not just “my” students. And I want them to achieve in all of their subjects, not just in mine.
5. Graduate school. I started working on my Master’s degree in Educational Administration to be a building principal. However, after this semester I’ve decided to put it on pause. I’m not sure if it’s really for me to be honest.
6. Numbness. For a few months I felt completely numb to the preaching of the Word. Which bothered me because my walk with the Lord is diligent. I’m in the Word every day. Praying every day. There wasn’t any “big” sin in my life. I’m not sure why I felt numb to the preaching. I think it’s because of the circumstances in my life from #1 and #3. I still feel numb sometimes and I think it’s because God doesn’t just want me going through the motions.
7. My gratitude. I’ve been a lot more grateful for things in my life and I’ve come to recognize that the Lord gives and takes away. So I need to be humble and maintain a spirit of thankfulness. I’ve definitely become more thankful.
Change is difficult. Things aren’t always what they seem.
Nonetheless… My cup runneth over and I am truly blessed.